lost love

This category contains 8 posts

moments of silence

Moments of Silence I sit across from you, Sharing at an empty bed, Eons and heartache away, Wallowing in your solitary silence; I catch its meaning from each breath. Your pain filters through my intensity, Your emptiness fills my soul. I steady myself against your misery, Your violence crashes through my life, Wipes away my … Continue reading

Why I left

  I needed to say why. No, I needed to show why. And not because I wish to justify my rationale for making you leave, or why I won’t take you back. No, I needed to be one more voice saying why violence is wrong. I, as much as any one else, can devolve into … Continue reading

this is the way our world ends

WARNING: The following contains inappropriate language. If you or someone within reading distance cannot or should not read such language, please do not continue. “Why can’t you just fucking die then you dumb ass cunt. Go die. Be paralyzed. Please!!!” “I am gonna hope every day 24/7 that happens to you.” “Actually first pay back … Continue reading

freedom falls

Don’t dare call me a romantic. I’ll accept that I am a romantic in the same way that our America, otherwise known as the United States to the rest of the Americas and the world, is romantic. America is a romantic idea because it is an idealized world that we create for ourselves, sometimes even … Continue reading

grieving about junk food

It occurs to me that maybe chronicling my grief here might not be the best idea, not because someone else might read it but because I may be somehow prolonging my grief. But then it really has only been about 36 hours since you left. I should give it time. I know I always said … Continue reading

lemongrass and jasmine

It’s still less than 24 hours since you left. I cleaned off the nightstand on your side of the bed. I’ve been sleeping there. I used the body pillow you bought me, tucking it in around me like you used to sleep beside me. The lemongrass jasmine lotion was sitting on the edge. I don’t … Continue reading

chocolate and waterfalls

this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, this is the way the world ends, not with a bang, but with a smile. I was warned that he would probably ask me out. When I first met the boy with the chocolate eyes, I failed to comprehend that he … Continue reading

to the boy with the chocolate eyes

His favorite treat was Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Whenever I was feeling guilty about a fight I would bring some home. Sometimes it was some other form of chocolate and peanut butter, a combination that my daughters and I find unfathomable, a crime against nature. But to him, there was no greater joy than the … Continue reading